Will Someone Please Punch Me in the Face Already?


It just occurred to me. I've never been punched in the face. Not once. Not even close. In fact, the only physical fight I ever got into was in 5th grade. It was an awkward slap-a-thon with another kid over some missing scratch-n-sniff stickers. Not one of my prouder moments. Now, you would think that roaming the planet for 41 years without getting punched in the face would be a pretty decent … [Read more...]

Are You a Big Fat Ugly Failure?

I was reading my bio today when it occurred to me that it wasn't quite complete. I left out a few things. Important things. Important enough that I feel somewhat obligated to fill in some of the missing pieces. So, if you wouldn't mind, I promise I will make this quick. Nowhere in my bio does it mention all of the jobs I was fired from. Or the gigs I did not get. It does't say anything about the … [Read more...]